No Good
by SaraStar
Summary: GregSara; oneshot. "I turn my head away, but my heart will remain." Greg overthinks his crush on Sara. Will he ever be able to let her go?


**Never thought I would write another Sandle story. I have been so out of inspiration because of the lack of Sandleness. But somehow this story came along. A little ray of hope to all of you faithful Sandlers out there (I know there are some still!).**

Enjoy!

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_**Cursive printed text are lyrics from the song 'No Good' by Kate Voegele. Greg and Sara belong to CBS.**_****

No Good****

_I've never feared the unexpected  
Until I found myself in this peculiar place_

Sara Sidle. It seemed to him like she'd been 'the woman in his life' so far. Kinda, sorta. No, actually she was, really. It sounded stupid, sentimental and pathetic – oh, he knew it very well – but unfortunately it was nothing but true.

_Unaware of where I was headed  
Oh, it turned out it was your footsteps I had chased_

She wasn't like anyone he had met before. The kind of impression Sara Sidle had left on him when she had walked into the Las Vegas Crime Lab eight years ago, he remembered well. She wasn't just beautiful (although he'd never, ever deny her beauty to anyone); she was also smart, funny, self-confidant, tough and strong. Honestly it had scared him a little at first. He had looked miles up to her. But soon he had discovered that all of this beauty wasn't reflected by pure happiness; on the contrary. Sara was not happy. Occasionally he had noticed this. One minute she'd be joking around with him, the next she could be turned into herself, as if the world didn't exist anymore. Every now and then, a black shadow could fall over her face. It had always been a mystery to him what it was that she was thinking of at these moments. Only a few times had he, carefully, tried to ask her this out loud. She hadn't really opened up to him, but he hadn't expected her to. Sara Sidle was just not the kind of person that would scream it off the rooftops when she was feeling miserable.

Still, he had somehow known that Sara trusted him. She had always treated him like an equal and had had his back. She had taught him a lot and Greg wouldn't be surprised if it was thanks to her that he had somehow miraculously passed his CSI proficiency.

Almost right away had it been clear to him that what he felt for Sara Sidle was more than just a co-worker relationship. When she was around, he felt special, appreciated. She'd just walk into his lab, smile at him, or even just nod his way, and he'd feel happy with himself. None had ever had that kind of power on him. As mentioned before, she wasn't like anyone he had met before.

Without him really noticing, a crush on her had started developing. And not just your one-day-lasting high school crush, but a deep, powerful crush that forced itself into him and that he wasn't able to get rid of. Sara Sidle was everywhere to him.

_Well, I should know so much better than this  
But you've occupied the center of my universe_

Of course he knew he didn't stand even the smallest chance. He was too young, too inexperienced, too immature and whatever more. And yet, there was something special between them and it wasn't just coming from his side.

_So I'm moving in reverse  
Under your mighty curse  
I hate myself for loving you___

For a while, Greg had been genuinely happy. Whether Sara saw him as just a colleague or more he hadn't known, but they were comfortable and cheerful around each other and that was all he needed somehow. He trusted her, Sara trusted him. And even though the future was unclear and Greg had no idea where everything was headed, at that time he didn't care.

However, at a certain point, someone else came into the picture. Greg had taken notice before of the tension there was between Sara Sidle and her boss, but he didn't think it would ever lead into anything serious. For he, thank you very much, still had enough self-confidence to realize he at least had better social skills than Gilbert Grissom.

He'd been wrong.__

I turn my head away  
But my heart will remain  
Until the day I learn  
You're no good for me

Then why was he here? Waiting for her, once again? Greg had no idea. But after receiving Sara's note she was getting back in town and if he'd like to come pick her up, he couldn't get to the airport fast enough.

So here he was, eagerly awaiting the person he admired and loved so much, dying to see her again after all this time. Sara Sidle once again had a hold on him, like she had had for the past eight years.__

It's illogical, it's outrageous  
The way I let you keep me hanging along

It _was_ illogical. Outrageous, definitely. Greg loved Sara more than anything, but there was no way of denying how many times she had let him down. And he kept on running after her, wherever she went, never taking a moment to stand still, catch his breath and figure out _why_ he was chasing after this girl. Why on earth he let himself be fooled every time again in believing that someday, somewhere she'd turn around and see him the way he saw her.__

Your character is that contagious  
Oh, I know I should have thought before I'd done

Realizations always seemed to come too late. If only he hadn't been so over his head all the time. If only he had thought about the things he was thinking about right now earlier. Then he might've been able to stop everything from unwinding this way. But now things were too far gone to fix the done damage.__

I've gone and let my impulse be my guide  
And on that note I'll be defenseless for some time

Still, there was one little question that spooked through his mind. Why had Sara chosen to write to _him_ about coming back? Him of all people? As far as Greg knew, none of the other CSIs had a clue of Sara's return. Yet him she'd found the right person to inform on it. Not Gil Grissom, who after all, had been her boyfriend for the past year (Greg couldn't stop a wave of the good old jealousy to hit his stomach), and who, if Greg was honest, he'd consider a more logic choice. But she had wrote to him. Was he supposed to read something in that? __

Oh, I'm moving in reverse  
Under your mighty curse  
I hate myself for loving you

Greg shook his head firmly, cursing at himself for even allowing that thought into his mind. He was spinning in circles, moving in reverse. __

I turn my head away  
But my heart will remain  
Until the day the I learn  
You're no good for me

Was this never going to end? He had had crushes before. They all faded, eventually. Why was Sara Sidle sticking? No matter how many times he told himself to turn his head away from her and accept that his feelings were, and would always be, unanswered, his heart remained stuck on his older co-worker.__

Hey, you there, keep your distance  
Don't you come around here

Greg was rudely awoken from his own thoughts when he suddenly spotted a familiar face between the people coming out of the gate. A rucksack wrapped around one shoulder, she worked her way through the crowd. Her brown hair, curly again, danced around her face as she moved.__

Don't test my patience, baby  
'Cause I ain't gonna let you off easy  
No, no, no

He didn't move a muscle. He waited until she would see him. At the same time he tried with all his might not to scream in joy to see her again. She was just as beautiful as he remembered her. __

Oh, you're no good, no  
No good  
No good, no good, no  


She had seen him. For a split second her eyes lit up. Then her face got a seemingly fearful expression. Her arm went up in the air in a greet, which he didn't answer. She slowly took it down again, almost ashamed.  
_  
I'm moving in reverse  
Under your mighty curse  
I hate myself for loving you_

He watched her as she walked towards him, carefully stepping around a lot of other people. Part of him wanted to walk away.

The other part knew that it was too late for that. __

I turn my head away  
But my heart will remain  
Until the day I learn  
You're no good for me

He wasn't going to let her intimidate him anymore. She didn't have the right.

She halted in front of him, lowering her rucksack off her shoulder to the floor. Her chest rose and then fell down again, in a heavy sigh. __

You're no good, you're no good, you're no good  
You're no good for me

"Greg…" she whispered.

_You're no good, you're no good, you're no good  
You're no good for me_

She inched closer to him, still staring right into his eyes. He stared back, but refused to move or do anything. He was not going to fall for it this time. In her eyes he read guilt and apology, but they were full of love too. Everything inside of him craved to pull her into a hug and tell her how much he missed her. But he couldn't. He wouldn't.

Then she smiled.__

No, no good

There was no way for him to escape. He was powerless before that smile. That precious Sara Sidle smile of hers. She pulled him with her into it; it filled him up with warmth. Warmth he hadn't felt all the time that she had been gone.

"I'm really happy to see you here," she said, softly.

_Oh, you're no good___

So was he. He would be lying if he said he wasn't. He was happy to see her, more than happy. He didn't want to be, but he was.

She took another step forward, until they were only a few inches apart from each other. __

Oh, you're no good

Her eyes looked at him questioningly. Very quickly, he nodded.

Then she stepped forward, pulling him into a hug. And he didn't push her away; he gave in. He had forgotten all the reasons why he shouldn't let her in anymore he'd thought of just a minute ago.

Instead, he pressed her tightly against his body, holding her. __

Oh, you're no good  
No


End file.
